Pure, even in Hell
by koemo
Summary: Haku and Zabuza meet up in hell, Zabuza confesses how he really feels about Haku and promises to make up for how he acted in life.


Haku looked around the dark place he'd found himself in. At first he was very uncertain of where he was or what was going on. Then it came crashing back, piece by piece, one at a time. He remembered failing Zabuza and bitter tears began coursing down his face. But then he remembered the exact circumstances of his death, he had died exactly as he wanted, in the service of his most important person. As literally as it was possible to do, he had placed his body between Zabuza and something that meant him harm and accepted death in his place. He smiled, brushing the tears away, he'd hoped that had been enough to please Zabuza. He hoped Zabuza would live and be happy without him.

Death hadn't been as scary as Haku might think it'd be. It had only hurt for a moment before he'd been gone. He'd had time to see the look of shock on the other ninja's face. Hatake Kakashi, the Copy Ninja. He wondered how he felt now. If he was like Zabuza, able to kill without a thought, or weak like him. He thought about what would happen to Zabuza now. Who would be his tool? Who would make certain he was taken care of? Who would make his dreams come true?

It was then that Haku realized he ought to think of himself as well, he'd been separated from Zabuza, so what did that mean for him? What would he do now? The man who he'd made his existence necessary wasn't here anymore. What had made his life worth something, hadn't followed him to the afterlife. What could he do now?

Fortunately, he didn't have long to worry about it. He had just succumbed to his forlorn heartbreak when he heard footsteps beside him. He looked around and saw his demon, his Zabuza.

"Zabuza-san!" his face lit up only to fall seconds later "this means you're... I failed to protect you?" he said, tears welling up in his eyes again.

Zabuza, disoriented looked, around, "Haku?" he put a hand on the boy's shoulder. "But how can you be here? I wanted to go to the same place, but we couldn't possibly..." he trailed off, trying to figure out where he was.

Haku waited silently for Zabuza to speak again, wiping away his tears, Zabuza hated when he cried. In the quiet they heard other voices, harsh, yelling, some threatening. Zabuza led his boy towards them and the firelight they could see, intent on investigating this.

They stopped on the outskirts of a fire, eyeing four men who were sitting around it, passing a bottle of sake. They were too drunk and focused on an argument they were having about who had won a particular fight to notice the newcomers. Zabuza put a finger to his lips, signally Haku to be silent, in case he wouldn't assume so anyway.

In the blink of an eye, Zabuza had gotten behind one of them, grabbed his hair, pulling his head back, with his mouth near his exposed neck.

"If you like not having your throat ripped out, you'll answer my questions, understood?" Zabuza asked, shaking him once, roughly.

"Yeah! Sure! What is it?!" the man said, panicking.

"Where are we?" the demon of the mist asked, looking expectantly at him.

"Whoa! We're in hell! The fuck did you think?!" the man grumbled, pulling away from him as Zabuza let go.

Zabuza promptly walked back to Haku, put his arm around him and pulled him away from the group. Once they were alone again, he put his hands on both of Haku's shoulders, looking at his boy's face. He saw that he'd been crying and Naruto's words came rushing back to him, his stomach twisted in guilt. His Haku, his pure, pure boy had thrown his life away for him and now he was here.

"Haku, I'm so sorry. I don't understand why you're in hell. You were such a pure child," Zabuza said, using one hand to tilt Haku's chin up to look at him.

"I expected to go to hell, Zabuza-san," Haku decided to help his confusion first. "After all, I killed my heart for you."

Zabuza watched his Haku's eyes find his own as he stated the truth so simply, so matter-of-factly. His guilt intensified. He'd demanded this boy merely be his tool. He'd asked horrific things of him, only ever gave him orders. And that had been enough for Haku, even though it had hurt him deeply, he'd always fulfilled his duties. Such a gentle child, had been happy to be a deadly weapon, even as it broke his heart, because it meant that somebody needed him.

The demon knelt before Haku, tears, once so rare, now commonplace, flowing down his face. He looked up into the concerned face of his boy. He put his hand on his cheek, wanting to make up for all the affection he'd not given him in life, this time it felt warm and he saw Haku's eyes dance happily, even while swimming with confusion. He would make this all up to him now, he just needed to explain first. Haku would never know what he was worth if Zabuza didn't tell him.

Haku put his hands over Zabuza's on his cheek, he didn't know what was going on, but he knew he wanted to hold this touch, soft and gentle, like this forever. He was worried when he saw Zabuza crying, what could have made that happen?

"Haku, we need to talk. I want to apologize," Zabuza said heavily, eyes searching the boy's pale face, looking for any hint of understanding.

At first Haku felt total disbelief, then confusion.

"Haku, I'm sorry. I didn't treat you nearly as well as you deserved. I shouldn't have made you do all those things you didn't want to. I should have showed you a little kindness, understanding. I should have realized how important you are to me. I'm so sorry I didn't. You did everything I ever asked," his voice broke over the next part "you've even died and gone to hell for my sake," tears streaming down his face.

Haku smiled at his demon, as sweetly as ever. "Zabuza, please stand up," he requested, using his sleeve to dry his tears.

When Zabuza complied, he looked up at him, exactly as it should be. He did something he wouldn't have dared do in life. He wrapped his arms around Zabuza and held him close, resting his head against his chest for a moment, then looking up into his eyes.

"Zabuza, I wanted to do those things for you. All that I have ever wanted is to please you, to make your dreams come true," Haku said simply, honestly, sincerely.

The demon of the mist, once so sure he had no heart left, smiled down at the boy, feeling it melt. He wrapped his arms around him, holding him to him, gently, tenderly.

"Haku, I cannot change what is done, but I can change what will be. Allow me another chance. Forgive me. I will always take care of you. You went to hell for my sake, allow me to turn it into heaven for yours," he promised him.

Haku's eyes lit up with joy and he beamed.

"Zabuza, there's nothing to forgive, but thank you," he told him, the happiest he could ever remember being, he was worth enough to Zabuza for him to act this way.

Zabuza cleared his throat, "Haku, there's one more thing I want to say," he started.

"What is it?" Haku asked, looking curiously up at him.

He looked at his boy, his hopeful, innocent face, happier than he'd ever seen it in life. Eyes bright and shining. A small smile gracing his lips as he waited for Zabuza to say what he wanted. He was a beautiful boy, young, bright, and now happy. And even here in hell, still pure.

"Haku," Zabuza smiled before pressing a kiss to his forehead, "I love you."


End file.
